Why do I gravitate towards the negative? Why do I latch on to that which is sad or tragic?
I need to stop this for fear of losing my mind!!
I have briefly mentioned my struggle with depression and anxiety. It's not something I like to go into depth on for a couple reasons. 1) I'm not sure how much of that stuff I really want public, and 2) I don't know who is reading this blog [see item 1]. But I do feel like that part of me contributes to a lot of my weight issues so it cannot be completely ignored here.
I am prone to SADness at this time of year. Even the happiest people can be affected by the darkness so it's no wonder that long about mid-January and February I am usually at my lowest of lows. This year is a bit different because I feel so much better about myself than I have in years past. I feel more fit and more healthy and I am exercising, even if it's not as often as I'd like. But the dark days are still getting to me now.
Just this morning I spent time reading someone's blog who is going through a tough time, then I searched out other information she mentioned, and the next thing I know I'm feeling really down. That type of thing is so detrimental to my mental health and I know this. So why do I do it? I finally took charge, closed the browser window, and now I am trying to get all that nastiness out of my mind.
Today I am working at home for one purpose: so I can run outside at lunch time. I need to get out there and run. The treadmill just doesn't give me that same release that the fresh air can give. The sun is shining today and I cannot wait to feel it on my face. I know that getting out there will help me feel better and chase away some of these winter blues. And as long as I stay away from the negative stuff, I will be doing much better this afternoon than I am this morning.